No I am not pregnant. Just to be clear.
I've been baffled at the subject of this post for a time, and I wasn't quite sure what or how I wanted to present my thoughts, but I need to get it out. So, I live in Utah. People are obsessed with having babies here. I get it, you want to start a family, that is great. And yes babies are adorable. I really don't have a problem with that as long as you have decided it on your own terms. I am so happy for all of my friends who are having babies, or already have them. It's when people start feeling like they have some obligation to get pregnant now and start having babies ASAP when they get married that I see a problem. These kinds of decisions are completely personal... at least I believe they should be. No one should be telling you when you should be having kids, or badgering you to start. Now I am not one to fall for this sort of pressuring, but there are plenty who do.
The past few weeks I have been to church there has been a lot of talk about "your duty to become a mother." First, I believe becoming a mother is a wonderful thing, but come on people lets be sensitive here. There are so many wonderful things that women can do, and not all of them include being a mother. I want to go to grad school. How could I possibly start raising kids (and doing a good job of it) while doing that? I'm sure it has been done, but I wouldn't be able to do my best in both areas at the level I would hope for if I was doing both at the same time. Also, what about all those women out there who have never been married, or who cannot have children? How does it make them feel when people are obsessing, saying it's "a commandment to multiply and replenish," and "why wait?" Seriously? There are plenty of reasons to wait. Lets see, financial reasons, personal readiness.. I think you need to truly have a desire to be parents before you become parents, Schooling (like I mentioned earlier). There are plenty more I could list, but you get the idea. My point is, everyone is there own individual and everyone wants different things at different times. It's nobody else's business when you choose to do what.
To get to the point of why I was posting about this is something that happened a few weeks ago at church... Sitting in relief society/priesthood a sister announced an upcoming activity for the women. She said to come pick up a handout after class. Later, I saw all the girls holding these boxes? Kind of strange for a handout, so I went to check it out. Imagine my surprise when I pulled this out of the basket.....