Monday, February 7, 2011

Pregnancy....

No I am not pregnant. Just to be clear.

I've been baffled at the subject of this post for a time, and I wasn't quite sure what or how I wanted to present my thoughts, but I need to get it out. So, I live in Utah. People are obsessed with having babies here. I get it, you want to start a family, that is great. And yes babies are adorable. I really don't have a problem with that as long as you have decided it on your own terms. I am so happy for all of my friends who are having babies, or already have them. It's when people start feeling like they have some obligation to get pregnant now and start having babies ASAP when they get married that I see a problem. These kinds of decisions are completely personal... at least I believe they should be.  No one should be telling you when you should be having kids, or badgering you to start. Now I am not one to fall for this sort of pressuring, but there are plenty who do.

The past few weeks I have been to church there has been a lot of talk about "your duty to become a mother." First, I believe becoming a mother is a wonderful thing, but come on people lets be sensitive here. There are so many wonderful things that women can do, and not all of them include being a mother. I want to go to grad school. How could I possibly start raising kids (and doing a good job of it) while doing that? I'm sure it has been done, but I wouldn't be able to do my best in both areas at the level I would hope for if I was doing both at the same time. Also, what about all those women out there who have never been married, or who cannot have children? How does it make them feel when people are obsessing, saying it's "a commandment to multiply and replenish," and "why wait?" Seriously? There are plenty of reasons to wait. Lets see, financial reasons, personal readiness.. I think you need to truly have a desire to be parents before you become parents, Schooling (like I mentioned earlier). There are plenty more I could list, but you get the idea. My point is, everyone is there own individual and everyone wants different things at different times. It's nobody else's business when you choose to do what.

To get to the point of why I was posting about this is something that happened a few weeks ago at church... Sitting in relief society/priesthood a sister announced an upcoming activity for the women. She said to come pick up a handout after class. Later, I saw all the girls holding these boxes? Kind of strange for a handout, so I went to check it out. Imagine my surprise when I pulled this out of the basket.....
Yes. They passed pregnancy tests out at church. Anyone else find that extremely weird? Not to mention inappropriate? Like I mentioned at the beginning of this post. I am Baffled. Steve and I were laughing so hard trying to figure out why on earth you would ever think to pass this out at church?

9 comments:

  1. I'm embarrassed for our church right now. I hope you don't have any non-member friends who read this blog cause if I were them, I would think we were a bunch of freaks. I agree with you Medu, having babies is a very personal decision that takes into account a lot of different personal circumstances.

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  2. Oh my word... This is too much. I'm with you, when should not be pressured. When we are ready to become mothers we will. This handout could have offended so many people. Bet they didn't think about that before handing it out.

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  3. Did u ever find out what their point was? I'm so curious! I have to know! So crazy!

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  4. I have no idea... The activity was all about pregnancy and such? I had no desire to go. It just seems over the top to me and inappropriate on so many levels.

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  5. So, so strange... I really want to know what it was about, you've peaked everyone's interest so now you have to find out. What was the teacher thinking anyway?

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  6. Ha ha.... I still can't get over this! If only one of the top dogs of the church could read your blog and come set these peeps in your ward straight! So funny.... there's only one solution: Get out of Utah;) The gospel is true... but some people are crazy!

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  7. It was for an activity that the relief society did... I have no idea why you would think to hand those out? I mean I'm all for creative advertising, but this just not qualify.

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  8. Totally inappropriate. Absolutely with ya on it being a private, personal decision between you, your spouse and the Lord..that's it. Did they even think about those couples that are dealing with infertility and that just rubs it in too?! Weird! Is this a student ward? because I can't imagine this happening in a regular family ward with all different ages in RS. Can you imagine handing that to a 80 yr old grandma? hahaha

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  9. um.... oh my goodness. who's idea was this and what made them think it was a good one! ha ha.

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